Valentine’s day at Starbucks

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Valentine’s day is a good day for coffee.

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Juvenile Cockerel Maze

Happy Chinese new year

Happy Chinese new year

spoiler alert

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Chinese New Year in Shanghai – 新年快乐

Whilst much of China is setting off fireworks and welcoming the year  of the Piers Morgan, in a bid to prevent pollution this is the scene in Shanghai…

上海快乐

上海快乐

 

 

 

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How to select all photos in iCloud without having to click on each one

You cannot.

Very useful when you have 1000+ photos to download.

https://discussions.apple.com/thread/6857848?start=0&tstart=0

Happy year of the cock to Apple.

Happy year of the cock to Apple.

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A Damsel in Distress and a Damson in a Dress

If you find you are having difficulty working out the difference between a Damsel in distress and a Damson in a dress there are a few things you can look for to determine which is which:

  • Damsons tend to have a bigger waistline
  • Damsels will be showing more stress, damsons do not tend to worry about anything
  • Damsons taste fruity, Damsels taste fishy
  • Damsons live in trees, Damsels live in towers
  • Damsels usually are hairy, if a Damson is hairy then it is probably a peach

Just to help here are some photos of both…

princess in distress

If only a fashion expert in shining armour could rescue this princess from her dilemma. Should she wear boots or glass slippers to the ball?

Bigger waist, less hair, more fruity than fishy but a lot less high maintenance.

Bigger waist, less hair, more fruity than fishy and a lot less high maintenance.

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DRS and Snicko

Wouldn’t it be nice if the cricket video umpire tools DRS and Snicko were actually controlled by owls…

Doctor S and his sidekick Snicko

Doctor S and his sidekick Snicko

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Mandarin secret 1: How to remember Subject + Verb + Noun

I am far better at getting Chinese words in the correct order than learning the actual words, so I am going to share some of my memory secrets. The first is how to remember the order Subject Verb Noun.

I always think of Subject as a type of squirrel, Verb as a sort of owl and Noun as a dragon like creature with short trunk like an elephant.

As squirrels like nuts, owls like eating small rodents that eat nuts, dragons with trunks pick up the nuts, roast them and give them to villagers in return for princesses and damsels.

Using elementary  graph theory techniques we can consider each type of word as having a degree of separation from a nut. Subject 1, Verb 2, Noun 3. So by remembering squirrel, owl, dragon with a short trunk, the word order is easy to deduce.

Subject squirrel, Verbowl and the Dragnoun

Subject squirrel, Verbowl and the Dragnoun

 

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Olympic Excitement

If you love the four times table, the Olympic Games (not the cold one) is the sporting occasion for you.*

I was interested in the fact that the Olympic rings are meant to represent all the colours on any flag of the world.

For example that great Olympic country Russia has a flag that is red white and blue, represented by the red ring, the blue ring and the white background. Here highlighted in pharmeceuticals and faecal brown…

 Citius - Altius - Fortius or Medicament - Occulto - Condono?

Citius – Altius – Fortius or Medicament – Occulto – Condono?

 

*or the Euros if you are not English

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Catchphrase Idea

Here is an idea for the classic quiz show, a phrase I find myself saying only too often…

Say what you see...

Say what you see…

And the solution… something we all should agree with.

No more f'ing meetings

No more f’ing meetings

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Meeting Minutes

Although I have not posted any meeting minutes for a while, 开会 is if anything more of a popular pastime in China than it ever was in the UK. Here are my notes from todays meeting…

Interesting fact: Samsung Phones english translation of chinese translation of bollocks came up with "Albanian Nonsense"

Interesting fact: Samsung Phones english translation of chinese translation of bollocks came up with “Albanian Nonsense”

Hedgehogs are mild creatures but even they can get angry when you waste their time.

Hedgehogs are mild creatures but even they can get angry when you waste their time.

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