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Grumpy Parrot

Harry the grumpy parrot’s astrological guide

Harry (Cancer) has kindly given me his guide to sun signs…

Harry the grumpy parrot
Harry the grumpy parrot
Aries
Aries (Mar 21 - Apr 20)

Stop dropping litter

Taurus
Taurus (Apr 21 – May 21)

Lose some weight you porker

Gemini
Gemini (May 22 – Jun 21)

Stop walking around with your trousers half way down your buttocks showing off your boxers while your trousers are staying up by wishful thinking alone.

Cancer
Cancer (Jun 22 – Jul 22)

It is probably up to you to sort the rest of the world out.

Leo
leo (July 23 – Aug 21)

Stop parking illegally in other people’s way just because you have put your hazard warning lights on.

Virgo
Virgo (Aug 22 – Sep 23)

Stop talking and eating at the same time, I don’t want to see your chewed up food.

Libra
Libra (Sep 24 – Oct 23)

Stop acting like you know it all, you are becoming boring.

Scorpio
Scorpio (Oct 24 – Nov 22)

Pull yourself together

Sagittarius
Sagittarius (Nov 23 – Dec 22)

Stop pushing in front of people in queues.

Capricorn
Capricorn (Dec 23 – Jan 20)

Stop getting so drunk you vomit all over the pavement.

Aquarius
Aquarius (Jan 21 – Feb 19)

You dress like a whore, cover up.

Pisces
Pisces (Feb 20 – Mar 20)

Use deodorant, you smell.

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