Categories
Lessons

Goodbye June and all you can teach us (28th-30th)

Monday

“Ich drücke Dir die Daumen” (singular you), “Ich drücke euch die Daumen” (plural you) is german for an equivalent to “I’ll cross my fingers for you” (but is more to do with thumbs).

Tuesday

I learnt a few ways to fold a pocket square, and I will probably model the 3 stairs method on Saturday.

Wednesday

I now know what causes that smell you can smell during a thunderstorm and sometimes just before a summer storm. Apparantly it is geosmins from the spores of the streptomyces bacteria that live in soil. I personally still love the smell despite now knowing this.

Categories
Limerick

Iphone four teething trouble

On launch day many people did stop,
In the queue outside the O2 shop,
They would spend their cash,
On phones that cannot do flash,
And with bugs that made the phone quite a flop.

…

So to phone you have to hold it just right,
Unless you can mount a good legal fight,
You could just run an app,
On the phone that is crap,
And use a landline instead of this shite.
Categories
Limerick

The Joy of Nags

There once was a persistent nagger,
Who tried to find men that she’d badger,
She’d go on and on,
‘Til the men had all gone,
And there was noone left who would still shag her.
Categories
Limerick

In Defence of the Geek (and against all those “cool” people with air for brains)

Some people will look down on a geek,
Which really is demonstrating some cheek,
These people are sick,
And totally thick,
As they live their pathetic existence each week.
Categories
Limerick

The Beautiful People

There are some people who are quite mathematic,
Who are capable of feats arithmetic,
They sit on their bums,
As their brains do some sums,
Yet they are perceived by many people as tragic.
Categories
Limerick

The Banker

Apparantly a type of person left us in a mess,
Our economy’s strength getting less and less,
These people are bankers,
They are such big wankers,
And they are totally full of bs.
Categories
Limerick

Management Consultant (Careers Advice)

If you like to annoy those doing honest work,
And if you don’t mind coming across as a berk,
Become a management consultant,
Which will lead to the resultant,
Consequence of you being labelled a jerk.
Categories
Limerick

Accountancy and Lawyers

There once was a successful lawyer,
Who would sue you as soon as he saw ya,
He was a bit of a tit,
He was a total git,
But for tonnes of cash he’d fight a case for ya.

…

There once was a Chartered Accountant,
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Categories
Limerick

Stockbroking for bisons

Once a bison was a big name in the city,
Who would buy stocks to add to his kitty,
Other brokers found him scary,
As he was definately more hairy,
And he was also no doubt far more whitty.
Photo0617
Categories
Lessons

June Lessons for the Longest Day and Beyond (21st – 27th)

Monday

Mexico City has the worlds largest University UNAM, (measured by the number of students enrolled).

Tuesday

The Japanese for death by overwork is Karōshi. It is s0mething I am always conscious of avoiding.

Wednesday

Slovenia is the richest Slavic nation, and I learnt exactly where it is which is a bit embarrassing as I really ought to have known

Thursday

The USA came third in the first World Cup (there was no third place play off then but they were recognised by FIFA as having a better record than the other beaten semi-finalists Yugoslavia).

Friday

Apparantly no team has lost a World Cup match after being 2-0 up at half time.

Saturday

Richard Coles of the Communards is now a Church of England priest. Also Ridley Scott directed the famous Hovis advert shot on a cobbled street in Dorset (not Yorkshire).

Sunday

The biggest defeat England have ever suffered in World Cup Finals is 4-1 against Germany in 2010 (June 27th)