Month: March 2011

Categories
New Year Resolutions 2011 Unusual Hybrids

The Dog Fish – And Chaos Theory

Is it a fish or is it a dog, is it a fishdog? No its a dogfish. Some crazy people think dogfish are a type of shark but I think it is a close cousin of a beagle…

It is said that if a dogfish wags his tail in the South China Sea it can cause good surfing in Newquay. This is a known as the Dogfish Effect and is a key concept in Chaos Theory.

Get the surfboards out, this is one happy fish...
Categories
Uncategorized

Keep Rich and Bountiful

I decided that the song “Keep young and beautiful” was a bit shallow and thought anyone can come up with a shallow song about love…

What’s cute about little cutie
It’s his cash, not brains
Old father time will never harm you
If your money still remains
After you grow old, man
~
Keep rich and bountiful
It’s your duty to be bountiful
Keep rich and bountiful
If you want to be loved
~
If you’re wise exploit all the masses
Take their cash, off of him, off of her
When you’re seen anywhere
Show your platinum card off
Wave wads of cash in the air
~
Money is better than all your charms
Be rich and always be in someone’s arms
Keep rich and bountiful
If you want to be loved
~
forget the teeth we all know what you ladies love...

~

Incidently for a real video nasty check this out…

Categories
New Year Resolutions 2011 Sonnets

Stairs

You can go up them and down them, how amazing is that?

Stairs…

Oh glorious thing that is the flight of Stairs
A method of getting higher by your feet
Lifts can get stuck and a person their odour shares
So the reliable method of ascent isn’t beat.
So be happy and rejoice when it’s time to ascend
Be ecstatic and merry afterwards when you go down
It is joyous whether going up or descend
Especially after getting ready to hit the town.
But it has to be said that some stairs go too high
And accidents occur on them when you have to shift
And stairs get harder to manage as time goes by
And you then have to invest in a Stannah Stair lift.
But without more storeys more space we’ll take
Without stairs man  will spread out like a pancake.
~
Building a stairway to heaven but giving up after 5 steps may look like this and make a far better song too.
Categories
Limerick

Platelets

There are things that help the blood to clot
And you should have of these quite a lot
So have some of mine
Then you’ll be fine
If a low platelet count you have got

And get well soon Y!

Categories
Doodles

Pancake Day Again!

In their latest adventure Shrove and Mardis Gras bring pancake day cheer to a spoilt brat, an ungrateful tart and an english hating scotsman…