Mike's World (brain farts and other adventures)I used wax crayons for the first time in decades when a toadstool turtle hybrid came round to pose for a portrait…
(It is said that a bad worker always blames his tools and I am no exception. I have decided that wax crayons are rubbish and probably are best left as a tool to keep children quiet for a few minutes…)
I am moving on to a new job, not because I do not like where I work but I have been there 10 years. Over that time I will take many happy memories with me, but there is one that is far greater than any other.
To welcome new students into college this amazing crossword was produced, unlike every other crossword in history in this one the answers did not always cross and very often were not words…
e.g. 1 down INITIAL ASSESSTENT (helped out by the 11 down clue that adds the tent)
8 down UCASP (University Central Admission Service with a P on the end)
8 across N SUPPORT (even though the clue suggests there is no N)
10 down LRCR (learning Resource Centre with an R on the end)
7 Across is TWO WAY REVIEW, although there is no space in the grid for 7 across. Luckily it fits into 11 across and 11 does rhyme with 7…
Never in the history of a4 paper has one sheet of a4 paper given so much pleasure to so many people over so much time… it is enough to get me poetic…
The Great Familirisation Crossword
It is nearly time the time that i will move on And of all my memories if I’d choose one This will make me smile fondly when I have gone Its the stroke of genius and a puzzle thats fun It is the worlds most amazing crossword To welcome new students these things were sent Now some may think non words not crossing’s absurd But they can be in awe of the intial assesstent You can find books in the LRCR Get N support and college opportunities grasp Then after two years students can go far If they send their uni apps off to UCASP so out of the puzzles that have been done The best was for familirisation ~
You can download your very own copy of the crosswordtent to printout here : crosswordtent
There once was a fridge tall and white And inside was a magnificent sight Amongst egg milk and juice There was a canadian goose Feasting merrily on Muller Light ~
Here is the line up for Britains Got Talent…
1. A boy who sings
2. A scottish man who sings
3. A man who can sound like other people
4. A boy who dances
5. Four more boys who sing
6. A mad woman on an organ
7. A young lad on a piano
8. An old man who dances
9. A young man who dances
10. Someone who can sing even though he lives in a caravan – surely not possible is it something from the devil? (At least he can play the guitar as well)
in beerogram terms:
Dancing 
Keyboards
Other
At the moment in my pocket there are 5 objects. hence BGT versus things in my pocket to see what has the most variety…
BGT 
my left trouser pocket
Conclusion : there is more variety in my left pocket than in this years final of Britains Got Talent
I am sure this is the next teenage sensation. He has the biggest moobs of any teenage boy and I am sure he will get the teenage girls’ hearts racing…
It seems as if I will not be flying emirates, drinking coca cola, buying addidas products, Macdonalds nor EA games…
Congratualtions to the hotbeds of football Haiti, Congo, Benin, Cyprus and Fiji for rushing to Sepp Blatter’s support today. After all the FIFA family is a very delicate and precious flower and we would hate football to ruin it all for them…
So that hotbed of football cyprus Backs Blatter and asks what’s the fuss? Whats a bribe here or there Why should we care As long as a few quid can be thrown at us ~ Grondona* asked for Falklands for his vote Which as far as bribes go is one of note Maybe give us back football Then give us a call Your association with FIFA is no reason to gloat ~ So well done Fiji, Haiti, Congo, Benin For propping up a footballs version of Lenin So while the FIFA’s inbred family Back pat, and backhand happily The true football family must consign them to the bin _____________________________________________________________________________Another example of what a quality human being and fantastic FIFA family member Julio Grondona is can be found from the following quote…
‘I do not believe a Jew can ever be a referee at that level (Argentine Premier League) because it’s hard work and, you know, Jews don’t like hard work.’FIFA senior vice-president and chair of Finance Committee, Julio Grondona, 5 July 2003. Buenos Aires